Secrets Best Kept

There are some things your children should not know. One of those things is what they're getting for Christmas. That's a pleasant surprise. Another thing children should not know is when (and how!) their parents have sex. That would be an unpleasant surprise. And finally, my son Luke should not be told that next week he has an appointment with needles. The worst surprise of all.

Yes it is once again time for pricks! I am very unhappy about the entire situation. I am unhappy that Luke has to be jabbed numerous times with sharp objects. I am unhappy that I am the one who is responsible for subjecting him to it. And I am unhappy that if it has to happen I have to be present at all. Couldn't I just go hide under a rock for a few minutes while my child screams in agony?

No - on second thought, I'd rather be there with him. If he's going to cry, he should cry on the shoulder of someone who loves him as much as I do. Hopefully if I cry as much as he does I won't scare him, though.

News: Luke has learned to spit! I know it's not a behavior that I should be encouraging, but when he does it I can hardly keep from laughing! He takes some water in his mouth, then sticks his tongue way out and goes "Bwwwww". Then he looks around to see if there's more of that wet stuff to put in his mouth.

Funny little story: The other night we baby-sat my neice Cameryn. Several times she ran over to Derek and shouted "Dickert! Dickert!" We had no idea what she was saying at first. After a few rounds of her shouting and us looking totally bewildered she pointed at Derek and said, "Dickert! Come!" and Dickert-excuse me, Derek, went and Cameryn was appeased. Dickert, my husband, poured her some juice and ate yogos with her the rest of the evening. We all love Dickert.

Happy Turkey Day!

We're not eating turkey today and I must say I am quite happy with that situation. All the poor turkeys on tables being carved! Perhaps if we refrain from consuming a turkey, one more turkey will live to gobble another day.

Speaking of turkeys, I have a pretty scrumptious, juicy, fat turkey of my own here. Look at these chubby feet! I've never seen such curvaceous feet! The top of Luke's little foot is so round that he has a dimple at the top of his big toe. His big toe has so much chub on it that it doesn't know where to put itself and makes a funny little bump on the bottom, and each of his long grabby toes are round miniature sausages that he can hardly bend because they are so tightly stuffed! Even his ankles have abundant wrinklage. He's just nibbly-cute!

Signs of Development

These pictures are to show you the garland in our kitchen. I love sitting in the living room at night with only the Christmas tree and the garland lights on. This morning Luke sat and looked at the tree for the first time! He hasn't really been interested in it up until now.

Last night I noticed that Luke has graduated from some of his simple toys to more complex toys. He used to love the yellow and purple circle on his exersaucer. He would chew on it and shout at it all day with barely a glance at the other toys. Then for a while he was fascinated by the tall toy with the beads in it that rattle around at eye level and it kind of looks like alien antennae. Now Luke's love is devoted to the green and blue toy that is a little harder to reach, and a little harder to work. When you spin it (which is a challenge for him because it's stiff) it snaps as it turns. It's also got beads that move up and down on the side.

He is definitely growing up. Celeste said yesterday that she can see where a tooth is coming in! I look and look and am not quite sure I know what she's looking at, but I believe her. That would be a good excuse for all these sleepless nights.

Munchkin

I suddenly realized that we have a pet name for Luke. In fact he is rarely referred to as Luke in our household; he is Munchkin. We didn't set out to have a pet name, it just happened. But I guess it's better than "Weiner", which is what I call the dog.

Third Time's a Charm

On Friday, Luke rolled over three times in a row! I clapped my hands and smiled and shouted "You did it! You rolled over! You're so talented." And he just looked at me like I was a crazy person. Amanda's theory is that he's rolling over in his crib all the time when I'm in the basement doing laundry, so this rolling over stuff is already old news, I'm just out of the loop.

We've had several really rotten nights of sleep, but last night I thought I'd finally figured it out. I had Luke on his regular routine all day and I didn't let him nap at all in the evening...and he still decided that he was done with sleeping after four a.m. I fed him at four and put him back down. He woke up at five and I sang to him and bounced on the ball and put him back down. He woke up at six and I walked him around the dining room a few times. And finally it was seven, time to get up, and he was deep asleep! I can't believe I woke a sleeping baby, but in hopes that he will sleep better tonight, I decided to keep him on our daytime schedule and get up to eat at seven.

Saturday night I got to bathe Luke because Derek and his brother Doug went to rent a movie. I had such a good time pinching and kissing his little rolls that we ended up having a nude photo shoot (clarification: he was nude, I was clothed). A few years from now he'll hate me for these pictures, but isn't his bum just the cutest?

Wonderful Naps

Wow, Luke and I both just woke up from a two hour nap! It was wonderful and we are both happy and smiling now. I fed Luke and am going to grab something for myself and then we are going to run to the store while we're both happy and alert.

This morning I lay in bed as Derek tried to start the truck and it just wouldn't turn over. Then when I let Ally out I had to yank the door so hard and I realized I had cracked some ice that had been sealing it shut. I guess it was a cold one last night!

Luke is getting more adamant about wanting the food we are eating so I think we are going to start eating without him in the room. It'll be sad not to eat as a family, but at least Derek and I will get to eat! I'm not ready to start him on solids yet. I want to keep breast-feeding. And Luke says vhkjk bggfh

which of course means, happy friday!

Lost Brilliance

I know I had something brilliant to blog about today. I was laying in bed last night when a lightbulb suddenly appeared above my head and Derek groaned and said, "Turn that light off. Some of us are trying to sleep." So I turned the light off and went to sleep myself thinking I would remember it in the morning since it was so obviously brilliant.

This morning I woke up and looked around for a note to myself to remind me of my light bulb idea but all I could find was this:
NW Airlines: 1 800 225 2525
electric guitar 5pm
doctor
bank
ficus
bleach
oatbran
20max
15kids/3adults
order:
49
52
67
73
the stages of our front step
and Jeff Banman's phone number

I found all of that written on various notepaper piled on the desk, but none of that is really brilliant. So here we are. I will tell you about the funny face Luke is making in that one picture.

Luke is teething. Maybe that is why I lost the brilliance. I am going crazy with a fussy baby who doesn't nap properly and wakes up in the night just to be held (the holding bit is really quite sweet, it's the being awake part that's hard...and holding Luke does get tiring on the arms).

He is only happy in the jolly jumper or with the sippy cup. And the sippy cup frustrates him after a while because he hasn't quite figured out how to get the sipper into his mouth on his own every time. If one of those two things isn't happening, he is fussing and sucking on his lower lip. The one magic cure we've found is having Derek sing "Do do, do do do Do do" (if you can't tell what tune that is simply from reading the do's, it's I Dream of Jeannie). I'm trying to catch that priceless Luke smile on video still.

Sitting Up and Sippy Cups

Pictures: Luke sitting on his own (with his sippy cup), and never letting Ally out of his sight.


Luke has decided he wants to eat when the rest of the family is eating. If he doesn't get to join in on the chewing he will cry. When he first showed interest in "big person food" he would watch us chew and move his mouth in a chewing motion. Then he started reaching for our plates and cups.

So yesterday at lunch I let him drink out of my glass and this seemed to pacify him (water, only). But at dinner he sat happily gnawing on his hand until he realized it wasn't chicken and rice like the rest of us were having and he wailed. So we tried the sippy cup. We have totally skipped the bottle and moved on to sippy cups.

It was a great success.

Ally's Tricks

Hopefully this isn't sideways...we'll see. Luke really loves watching Ally do her tricks. He was laughing and giggling and squealing, and of course the minute we started taping he quieted down. Yep, it's sideways, so torque your neck around there...I don't know how to fix it! sorry

Diaper Day

This morning Luke peed all over his jammies, so he spent an hour or so in his diaper and was just too cute in the mirror. He used to cry when he saw himself in the mirror. Now he smiles and laughs. The collage is something I made in class last night. I only really had pictures of Luke on my flashdrive (I'm pretty much your typical mother that way-dragging out pictures of my kid if anyone asks how he's doing), so this is what I came up with.

Today I have to wash diapers. I don't have to wash them by hand - I have a washing machine. But washing diapers is still some work for me. I don't often think about how much work it is though, since it's just part of life. It's funny how we get used to things...even things we never expected to be doing.

I never expected to be a stay-at-home mom. I never really thought I'd be a mom, I guess. But here we are, and I am not just "used" to it, I am thriving at it. I certainly never expected to be cleaning dirty diapers, spending a large part of my day wiping up poop, snot and spit up. But I am very happy to do it.

I've been thinking a lot about how MUCH we have. We have clothes and food and a beautiful home and family nearby and clean vehicles to get us to and from work and the grocery store. We have money which we often say is just barely enough, but it's so much more than a large percentage of the world has.

It's hard to complain about housework for this very reason. In fact, I am beginning to see that I should feel grateful for these chores. I am thankful that I have a floor to mop. I am thankful that I have dirty dishes from a bountiful meal. I am thankful that I have diapers to clean and water to clean them in.

Skin to Skin

In Derek and my childbirth classes we learned about how important skin-to-skin contact with your baby is - especially in the first few hours. We made a point of holding Luke close because we learned it was important, but before long we also realized what a joy it is to be skin-to-skin with a tiny, silky, slurping baby.

My Mom asked me if Luke had started using his hands while he was eating when he was just a month old and she said that was the sweetest thing when her babies were breastfeeding - when they'd hold their hands up next to their face or just hang onto your shirt. At one month old Luke hadn't started using his hands. He would flail them around and hit himself in the face, but that wasn't the sweetness Mom was talking about.

Luke and I still get lots of skin-to-skin contact during feeding times. Lately he's started using his hands more, and Mom was right - it is the sweetest thing! Luke has his lower arm under my arm (the one holding up his head) and his tiny little hand is on the curve where my underarm becomes my back and he just opens and closes and opens and closes his hand so that he's brushing my skin with the tips of his fingers. When he's tired his top hand will just rest on top of my breast, but when he's energetic he will pull my shirt down over his face and then push it away and smile at me.

A Winter Reflection

I don’t like my toque to be too tight.
Something just isn’t right
About my head
Looking like an empty water balloon
On the end of a spigot
Waiting to be filled.

Today is a cold, windy day. Last night Luke slept fairly well, but was up for an hour around 5am. So this morning he slept in and now doesn't want a nap. I had some plans to go run errands but with the weather being so blustery and no morning nap we are considering an all-out leaving the house boycott.

Conspicuous Mud: Why Rushing Around Doesn't Work

Kathy: Luke just loves his blanket!

Some people thrive on fast-pace, little sleep, never-stop-rat-race. Even I often get a kick out of the adrenaline rush from a fast-pace evening, or as much as a fast-pace week. But time and again I trip over myself and prove that rushing around just does not work for me.

Last night I had aerobics, as usual. The monkey-wrench in the plan for aerobics was that now that Derek is working in the office he works until 5:30 (aerobics starts at 5:45). I figured I could start chili and leave it simmering while I was gone, feed Luke and put him down for a nap while I was gone , leave the moment Derek walked in the door and come home to a hot dinner, a happy baby and a clean, showered husband.

I left the chili simmering, I fed the baby and laid him down and as soon as Derek walked in the door I left. I was still ten minutes late. I parked across the street from the gym since the lot was full and raced into the entry. There are signs everywhere in the gym not to track dirt into the gym, to change into clean shoes, etc. So I never wear my tennies to the gym, I always change into them there. Well I kicked off my boots, tied my tennies and ran across the gym into the workout room and started kicking and stepping and punching with the rest of the women.

It didn’t take long to notice the brown patch growing beneath my feet in the mirror. Now I was wondering what to do – pretend like it wasn’t there and keep working out or leave the workout that I showed up late for, clean my shoes, come back and clean the floor and miss even more of the workout. I chose to clean up. I felt so conspicuous, but I figured it was better to be conspicuous cleaning up my mess than conspicuous for leaving a big muddy mess on the floor.

Finally the whole embarassing evening came to a close and I ran – no, sprinted - home. To top the evening off perfectly I came home to find a fussy baby and burned chili. But I can’t complain too much because Luke slept nine hours the night before, had two two hour naps during the day, and I couldn’t end up eating much chili anyway since my throat is still so sore. Still it ticks me off that my feet were muddy…

Far-Off Friends

Last night I had the wonderful privilege of talking to Kathy on the phone! This morning I talked to another far-off friend, Amanda. And not long after I hung up with Amanda my Plain 'ol Grammy called. I have a few friends here in Winkler now. At least, it's not such a desperate situation. I see Suzy almost every week and I go to the Mom's Group at church. I even have a lunch date with a new friend tomorrow, her name's Celeste (she has lots of potential - Luke spit up on her and she just laughed about it and wiped it off! Definitely a good trait in a new friend). But talking to my wonderful, far-off friends makes "far-off" not seem so far, and I feel refreshed after hearing your familiar voices.

I have to admit that I did not take a new picture of Luke today. This picture in front of the Christmas tree is from Saturday, and the video is from Friday. I am slacking off, but I have a good excuse. I have now been sick for an entire week. I'm going to have a birthday party for my ulcers tonight. You're all invited. I'm serving tea...and that's it.

I am hoping to get a picture of Luke sitting up on his own very soon. Maybe by tomorrow that's what you'll be looking at. He's doing little sit-ups now and I can't leave him in the high chair without buckling him in anymore. He can't sit up from laying down, but he can if he's just reclining - like if he's in my lap leaning back against me. This morning he leaned over and put his foot in his mouth! Everything ends up there if he has his way.

Monday night I had class and Derek did Luke's entire bedtime routine. We decided to try feeding Luke out of a cup instead of the bottle, since he screams so much. Luke loves watching me drink out of a cup and a few times I've let him drink some water out of my cup and he always wants more. A few times I've caught him staring at my glass and gurgling at it. Apparently he really enjoyed the responsibility of eating milk out of a cup, but most of the milk went down his jammies - and Derek had already given him a bath. When all the milk had disappeared (into his jammies or into his mouth) Derek put the cup on the table and Luke just screamed. He was still a little hungry, but mostly he was attached to the glass. I think he would have fallen asleep with his mouth on that empty cup if we'd let him. Luke's cup is his far-off friend.

More Jumping

Remembrance Day

Today is a holiday in Canada, which for Luke and me means Derek gets to stay home with us! We have already had a wonderful morning. Derek got Luke up and brought him to me to eat. When Luke was done eating Derek played with him for forty-five minutes until it was time for Luke to have a nap. And then Luke had a two hour nap! I went back to sleep after Luke ate and slept until 9am!

When I got up I made pancakes, had breakfast with Derek, finished my book and started laundry. So even though I slept in, it's been a very productive morning. I even did some vacuuming. I have vacuumed everyday since Derek finished installing the central vac. Derek got crumbs on the couch last night and I said, "you're not going to be allowed to eat in the living room anymore" and he said, "You forget, we have a vacuum now!" Well, I still don't like the crumbs, but vacuuming is pretty fun. Luke looks at me so strangely when I vacuum...it's as though he's never seen a vacuum before - oh wait, he hasn't!

Jolly Days

This weekend and today have been jolly days in many respects. In fact the only un-jolly part about it was that I discovered I have ulcers in my throat when I went to the doctor this morning. Other than the ulcers, which I've invited to dinner even though they're horrible guests, we had a great weekend. Derek got stuck in the snow on our driveway Friday evening and spent over an hour shovelling (I guess that's not really jolly, but it made it feel like winter). While he was outside, Luke and I put up the Christmas tree and strung the lights on it. Later in the evening Derek and I decorated it.

Saturday was a nice day to be home as a family. Derek finished installing my vacuum cleaner and I vacuumed everything in sight...even under the couch cushions! It was really satisfying to hear that grating raking sound as the vacuum picked up all the nasty stuff that's been on my carpet for who knows how long. Then Helene dropped off the jolly jumper that she picked up in Winnipeg.

Sunday morning, Derek assembled the jolly jumper and then went to play bass at church and Luke and I stayed home. I've just been kind of sick for several days and wasn't up to the trip out in the snow. Luke took several turns in the jolly jumper and is getting the hang of it, but slowly. In the evening we ended up having dinner at Harv and Helene's with the whole family. We planned ahead and swapped names for Christmas.

This morning after my doctor visit (and by the way, there's nothing you can do for ulcers...just wait), I went to pick up a package in Walhalla. It was Luke's second trip to the United States, and his first trip with a passport! He slept through most of the exciting stuff. We opened the package in the living room with Luke sitting in his jolly jumper and it felt just like Christmas sitting in front of the tree, opening gifts! These are jolly days.

The Silent Spitty Serpent Stalker

will be upon you when you least expect it. Trailing you around every turn. Stealthily slithering warm and wet down your sleeve, down your back, into your shoe. Unnoticed, undetected, unwarranted intruder. Embarassed passersby will point and stare and you will smile nervously confused. Until all at once you notice it: the silent spitty serpent stalker. One moment you were safe, and the next moment - it was there! on your shoulder, in your hair, on your neighbor; wet, milky, and malicious.

Yesterday afternoon the rain turned to sleet and in the evening it turned to snow. It was blowing like crazy and we got at least a couple inches. It's pretty slippery out there today though with the ice underneath. The sky is still slate gray and we have a drift of snow in front of our porch. Derek had to take a few runs down the driveway before he made it into the street, which pretty much means I won't be going anywhere today. I'm not going out there to shovel snow feeling the way I do.

Thinking I was starting to feel better was just a sypmtom of my fever. Luke and I are having a movie/nap day. All we're going to do is watch movies and sleep. Happy Friday, Happy Winter, Happy Spit.

Luke played peekaboo for the first time yesterday and really enjoyed it.



out the front window (above: this morning below: last night)

Too Sick To Do Much

I am far too sick to do much today. I officially have the flu. I wouldn't even be posting except now we have internet at home and I can post in my jammies just a few feet from my bed. Derek stayed home to take care of me and Luke. Turns out it's good he's home because we have a little crisis with all this rain. Since we don't have siding on the north wall and the rain is coming in at such a sharp angle, the water is getting in...it's seeping in around our bedroom window and the window in the basement. Hopefully he can figure it out while Luke and I take a nap.

I'm not posting a new picture today, but I don't think I posted these cute ones of Luke and Cammy together at Halloween. Hopefully we'll have new stuff for tomorrow and my body will repair itself.

Cold with a Cold

Pictures:
Ryan and Charity were over last night with their kids. Levi was born very close to Ezekiel, in February. Ryan and Derek were friends because their parents were friends and spent a lot of time together when they were little. Luke and Levi are a third generation of this friendship!

I woke up this morning with a cold, and Luke is coughing and congested a little bit too. Hopefully neither of us gets worse. After an hour and a half nap and some tylenol this morning I felt quite a lot better. And even when Luke is sick he seems to have a surprisingly positive outlook on life.

He's sitting in his exersaucer right now shouting at the tall yellow and purple toy. That's his favorite to shout at. This morning Helene came over and she and I planted phlox, lilies and my hydrangea. It is going to be really nice to have some green come up in the yard next spring. While we were out in the biting wind, Luke played nicely in his crib, and I think he even took a little nap, but he wouldn't admit it.

Yesterday was so warm, and today is frighteningly cold. Yesterday I went for a walk with Suzy in just a shirt and jeans and I even sweat a little. Today I had a scarf, toque, and jacket on and my hands were still icy when I came inside. It looks like Fall is over, and I'm glad it lasted as long as it did. But it's still hard to greet winter cheerfully this year. I'm scared of keeping Luke warm, and feeling housebound. Still, we had a gorgeous Fall, and the sooner winter comes, the sooner spring will arrive...right?

We Had Twelve Glasses

I was drinking out of a glass this morning that has an imperfection on the bottom and it is a familiar, comforting thing to see that imperfection on the bottom of the glass whenever I drink out of it. I know that glass intimately. It has been part of our family for almost five years.

I know we had twelve glasses. I counted them. I wanted to have as many glasses as we had plates. There were twelve. I did dishes yesterday and cleaned two glasses. Somehow there were still only four clean glasses in the cupboard. Two were being used.

If two were being used and four were in the cupboard that means we only have six glasses. Where did the other six go? Are they hiding? Did they go on vacation? Did they feel unloved and just leave?

It is a sad thing when glasses that are like family begin disappearing for no apparent reason, and nobody even notices the loss. I know we've broken a few...but SIX? No, impossible. I would remember that, wouldn't I? I'm afraid I am a terrible glass-mother. I don't remember when our numbers were cut in half. I haven't properly grieved the broken shards of our family.

I picked up the glass with the imperfection and looked through it to the bottom and said, "You, at least, will not be forgotten".

On a lighter note, the dirt came yesterday! I got out there this morning and played in it. I planted 45 Parade (red) tulips and 50 assorted daffodils. Luke went out with me too and fell asleep in his car seat. His toque got all twisted up. Yesterday he fell asleep with his toys twice. Normally he gets grouchy and I put him in his crib, he cries for a bit and then goes to sleep. Yesterday he just checked out in the middle of playing. Crazy kid. I think he was depressed about the missing glasses.

Dressing Up and Un-Dressing

Luke had a wonderful time dressing up for Halloween and then undressing at his Great-Grandma and Grandpa's 57th Anniversary dinner. He loved his little pumpkin hat, but on Sunday, after awhile the pants got boring. But it was fine because he had a toasty new car seat cover to sit in that is so warm he'll be just fine even without pants on! And his chubby little legs are so great to show off.

I sewed a car seat cover for Luke on Saturday, but since it sits inside the seat and he sits on top of it, there is very little room left for my chunky little monkey. Very soon we will have to be buying a new car seat...hopefully the car seat cover works in the new seat! I worked on that cover all day off and on. First I put the zipper on the wrong side of the fabric. Then I put the zipper inside out. THEN I put Luke in the seat and I could just barely squeeze his arms under the straps! oh dear. My Mom reminded me that this is why they say children are expensive...

Sunday evening was a lot of fun with the whole family. Well, all the aunts and uncles were there. Only a few of us "kids" were there. But that made it very intimate and nice. Everyone took turns holding Luke and playing with him. And I got to eat dinner entirely uninterrupted! Our family needs to get together more often so I can eat in peace the food other people made while they look after my child - HAha! It was better than that - Luke was being played with and looked after by people who love him, and that makes it special and fun.

Another wonderful weekend. Derek got lots done on the siding on Saturday and then got the vaccuum hooked up in the garage (we've still got pipes to run through the walls before it works), I sewed Luke's car seat cover, edited some maternity pictures for my sister-in-law and hung out with family. We even had time to watch a movie, just me and my husband. We watched The Life of David Gale. I would recommend it as a conversation piece-not for kids! I'm still mulling over the film...intriguing.